being spontaneous is the solution to your boredom in life
unpacking the greatest trick we play on ourselves
Sadness and disappointment aren’t so much to do with what happens but more with whether things turn out how we expect them to.
“Bad luck”.
One of the greatest tricks we play on ourselves, and sadly many people never clue on.
Being open to any possibility — or, in other words, being spontaneous — is how you wake up from the monotony and create a more interesting, fun and memorable life.
The Parable of Flow
A story from ancient China
One day, an old man stood on the banks of a roaring river. The current was fierce, tumbling rocks downstream and tearing branches from the trees. Onlookers watched in awe as the old man, seemingly frail, stepped into the water.
He was quickly swept away by the powerful current, and the crowd began to cry out in alarm, certain he would drown. But to their surprise, the old man reappeared further downstream, calm and unharmed.
When he finally emerged from the river, dripping but serene, someone from the crowd approached him and asked, “How did you survive such a dangerous current?”
The old man smiled and said, “I didn’t fight the water. I let it take me where it wanted to go. I didn’t resist the flow or try to swim against it.”
The Art and Balance of Going With the Flow
I think many people get “going with the flow” twisted.
They think it means to have no plan. To go through life like a gypsy.
But I don’t believe that to be so.
Cleverly going with the flow is having a plan but being comfortable pivoting whenever it’s required. Being comfortable having plans shaken up. Feeling at home in the uncertainty. It’s taking what the defence gives you. It’s playing with the hand you’re dealt.
And too often in life, we allow the uncertain future and rough currents to scare us away
Like the man in the flowing river, lately, I’ve been going with the flow.
I’ve been saying yes to stuff more. I’ve been doing things even if I’m unsure whether the outcome will be ideal or even satisfactory. I’ve been being optimistic and assuming the unknown will have more pros than cons. And if I’m wrong, it’s ok, because I had AN EXPERIENCE. And to me, all experiences are worth having.
The results?
I’ve had more fun, deepened connections with people I didn’t expect, felt lighter, been happier and enjoyed life more.
The famous quote comes to mind:
“We suffer more in imagination than in reality.”
— Seneca
The reality is not only less scary than we thought but actually holds the potential of so many incredible experiences.
It’s human nature to explore, do things, discover, create and experience.
And going with the flow, a.k.a. being spontaneous, allows us to thrive. It makes us feel alive. It opens us up to all possibilities and all combinations. It unlocks the pure potential of life, the incredible maybes that we close ourselves off to because it “might not be worth it”.
In 2025, I challenge you to be more spontaneous.
Sincerely,
eren
Follow me on Substack, Instagram and LinkedIn for short bursts of motivation and peace, and to follow along on my journey of creating the world’s best in-person mindset workshop.
Beautiful piece, Eren. It was just what I needed to read this morning. having just planned my day on Google Calendar, there's a reality that I tend to overlook - no matter how much I plan, there are 100s of reasons that things can go south.
I like that you remind me that this is not a reason to stop planning, but is the nature of life.
Hope you've been having a great new year!
To surrender to what life wants, not what I want 🙏