The Life Pyramid — How to Consistently Move Toward Your Destiny (Without Even Knowing What It Is)
Unsure of your life’s direction? Don’t know where to step next? Read this.
“What do you want in life? What do you like? What’re you passionate about?” — they ask.
I was sick of saying “I don’t know.” If only there was a way to know the best path. Maybe if you could just take a peek through a crystal ball, and see your destiny. Then, you could reverse-engineer the steps! I’ve got bad news and good news.
The bad news: There’s no crystal ball.
The good news: You don’t need one.
I had dinner with a Tier 1 engineering COO named Simon, and he taught me the concept of the Life Pyramid. It completely relaxed all my career, and life, direction concerns. The Life Pyramid concept shows you how to take meaningful strides toward your destiny, without knowing how, or where you want to go. Here’s how it works.
To find your destiny, bust this myth
You humans always think you’re destined for things, for tragedy or for greatness. Destiny is a myth. Destiny is the only myth. The gods choose nothing. You choose.
— R.F. Kuang
We have a preconceived view of destiny — an already written fate that we have to find. But that’s not it at all. It’s not prewritten. People will tell you to find your passion — as if your passion is a puppy waiting at the pound for you to adopt it. It also assumes you only have one passion path in life to locate. This is what life actually looks like.
Your current path is only one possibility in the plethora of opportunities you’ve been given. Your destiny isn’t prewritten — your destiny exists as pure potential. It is based upon a series of decisions you’ve made and will make. So before we go any further, accept that your destiny is too far away for you to be able to even comprehend it.
It’s at the very tip of your life pyramid — the final piece. But, you can’t build a pyramid from the top down. You have to start with the base — the foundations come first. But, how do you decide where to start?
This is where you might’ve gone wrong
Traditionally, you might think of life as a tall building. You pick your little square and that’s your area and you build up — your destiny being at the top. You’re expected to make a decision when you’re 17 years old, go into a degree, and then stick to that forever.
This way of thinking leads to a lot of stressed-out kids and unhappy adults. Life is everchanging. Your interests shift, your personality changes, and things happen that can flip your world on its head. How are you supposed to know what you’ll want to do in years’ time? How are you supposed to make that decision?
I was having dinner with the Chief Operations Officer of WSP as a part of a work trip. His name is Simon. Simon’s job was basically to do things like handle office building purchases, figure out the most effective layouts for staff and other things you wouldn’t really think about. It’s sort of an unorthodox job — very complicated, but very random.
Could he have planned his path to a job like that? What do you even do to get there? Simon replied:
No — I had no idea.
My journey to get here went from an office to on-site work, to moving to Hong Kong, heading operations of WSP Asia, a bunch of stuff in between, and now back to Australia.
I think of life skills kind of like a pyramid…
How to find your destiny without knowing what it is
The Life Pyramid concept says that everything you do contributes to your destiny. You’re not married to one decision forever — despite what you’re told. Instead of picking a tiny little square and occupying that same square footage upwards, you occupy a HUGE square and slowly narrow down your expertise over the years until you hit a very specific point. Why is this better? Because:
there’s no wasted motion anymore. Everything you do is contributing to your pyramid’s foundations, and
it allows us to freely roam the meadows at the bottom of that pyramid, where everything we do contributes to the foundations, instead of being caught up with where we should be going.
No more wasted time. Everything you’ve done up until right now in your life has been building your pyramid from the bottom up.
My Life Pyramid looks something like this:
I used to sit in the back room of my parents’ takeaway shop as a kid
As I got older, I worked in hospitality and retail —I worked in unglamorous environments, did some sales, and managed a mean boss
I was overweight and lost it all
I loved building things as a kid
I wrote poetry and stories when I was young
I also liked maths and building
I became an engineer
Started writing articles within engineering — my first ever article was for work
Left work and traveled the world
It might not seem like much, but looking back at these moments shows you how, and why, you’ve come to the point you’re at.
If it wasn’t for my early hospitality and retail jobs, I wouldn’t have built the social skills to succeed in engineering.
If I never tried building things or pursued my interest in math, I would’ve never gone into engineering.
If I’d said no to writing the article within engineering, I would’ve never found my passion for writing.
If I hadn’t entered the Year 3 poetry contest, I would’ve never found a strength of mine for writing, and I would’ve never pursued it.
If I hadn’t been overweight, I would’ve never built the discipline to show up to write every day.
If I hadn’t sat in that back room and seen the literal blood, sweat, and tears from my parents I would’ve never had the gratitude mindset for the self-improvement writing I do.
If I didn’t travel, I wouldn’t have half the perspectives to write about as I do now.
So if you look back, you can see how everything you did contributed to where you’re at now. This is a quick example, but you can dive deep into it and see how true it is. You never waste any motion, no matter how wasted it might seem.
I’d encourage you to take 5 minutes out of your day and look back at your life pyramid. You’ll start to see how logical it is, and how it really is the best way to look at your life experience. Every bit of experience you get will always just add to your resume.
Here’s why the Life Pyramid will help you move forward
It’ll allow you to take more risks in life. And here’s why:
You’re no longer confined to your little hamster wheel. The world has opened up and you can jump in whatever direction you desire because it will always help you. I’m not just talking about jobs, I’m talking about:
Travelling
Playing sports.
Volunteering on the weekend.
Sharing your thoughts on the internet.
Studying small courses that interest you.
Making and selling things at the markets.
Whatever it might be for you. It’s contributing to your personality, your experience, and your Life Pyramid.
2. It can be a useful tool to see your next step in life.
Your Life Pyramid can help you understand where you’ve come to, why it makes sense, and where you could step next. If you’re stuck — take a look back and see which parts of your foundation are most relevant. Which parts did you like and not like? Like my examples earlier about poetry and writing for work — my next step was to consistently write a blog. Use it to find your next step.
Do this to build your Life Pyramid most effectively
Stop focusing on the big picture so much. Focus on each decision in its moment. Do what you want to do — forget about whether it contributes to your “path”. Just do it, it’s all experience and it will build your pyramid. Don’t try and get straight to your destiny. Your next decision — where the rock climber places their hand next — is based on one thing, and one thing only — the best decision at that exact moment.
They’re not thinking about how hard it is to get to the top, or the exact path all the way up — they’re just trying to climb. Like you. You don’t know how it’ll contribute, it’s too far away to know that. But you won’t create your unique path by doing what other people think you should do.
It’s much more about a series of smaller decisions (in line with what you truly want), as opposed to a few big ones. The rock climber might move sideways, but they’re never wasting time or energy. You’re always heading to the peak in some way — even if you don’t see it yet. The person stuck at the bottom trying to calculate the best path is the one who’ll never make it.
The formula
Follow your heart → Build your pyramid → Arrive at the top.
As long as you follow your intuition at every fork in the road, you’ll end up where you’re supposed to be. Not somewhere prewritten, but somewhere that works for you. Follow what brings you energy and go toward things that make you feel alive. Build things that excite you. Take risks!
The truth is, you never know where you’ll end up. Ask anyone if their life has gone as planned, and you’ll see exactly what I’m talking about. So don’t focus on your plan, focus on building the sturdiest foundation for your pyramid, following your authentic internal compass along the way, and you won’t stumble into your destiny — you’ll write it.